It has once again been some time since we have posted. A lot has happened in the last 6 months. We were the recipients of a true and everlasting miracle on December 17th, 2009 when Amy discovered she was finally pregnant. All of the tears, patience and humility finally paid off. The frustration and sadness melted away. After a nearly 4-year journey of praying and pleading we were HAVING ANOTHER BABY! I cannot express the gratitude we felt to the Lord during that time. It was as if we would finally see and understand his plan for us.
However, due to some intial skepticism, Amy did take 4 pregnancy tests just to be sure-one of each brand of course. I still can't believe I waited a full day to tell Brandon. My heart was about to burst. But, I wanted to be sure. At that time Brandon's 30th birthday was drawing near and I wanted to do something special. I kept pestering him about whether or not he wanted to open his present early. He knew I was up to something, but I guess he thought I was being my usual dramatic self. He doesn't like early surprises. I had to be persistent. I finally emailed him a short poem to read. It was cheesy of course (he won't let me post it on the blog), but it sealed the deal. You see, Brandon had wanted a handgun for some time. However since we had been saving money for potential fertility treatments, I did not think it was a worthy expense and kept saying no. The poem talked about how two of his wishes were coming true. (I had to sneak in a few corny lines...)
"You asked for a gun, and I said maybe,
But now you need one to protect your baby"
"I hope you’re excited to share your life,
With a brand new gun and a pregnant wife"
Needless to say, he was thrilled. It was a calm and reflective moment for both of us. We both cried. We had planned to start fertility next month! Despite the fear and anxiety that new mothers feel about potentially losing their baby during the early stages of pregnancy, we knew everything would be okay. The only question was "how soon do we tell Taylor?" Five-year olds are not famous for their ability to keep secrets. It wasn't long. We just couldn't wait. We told him a week later. We were expecting fireworks and obsessive dancing as his response, but happily settled when we got a calm "yeah". He made a short Christmas video to announce the news to family and friends another week later. It was super cute.
As pregnancy continued, things became increasingly difficult. I was still recovering from my endometriosis surgery in September and the stretching pains became very hurtful. Additionally, there were major issues with my gallbladder due to intense nausea and sickness. My doctors put me on a great medicine (that they give to chemo patients) but my gallbladder attacks continued. In short, I was stuck eating nothing but bread, chicken and mashed potatoes with water for the first 16 weeks. I lost 8 lbs. I thought things would never end. However, my joy in being pregnant overshadowed the misery. It was more frustrating and embarassing than anything. I hated throwing up at school in the middle of class. Those poor students.
At 20 weeks, the pain subsided. It was another miracle. I thought for sure I would be sick the entire pregnancy. The Lord has had a great hand in our adventure. I finally had more energy, more excitment and quickly geared up for my "nesting phase". It was around this same time, we learned (what we knew all along), that this sweet precious baby was going to be A GIRL! I think we all had a sense of it, but did not want to jinx anything. We kept telling everyone we thought it was a boy (we lied) so that we wouldn't be disappointed. Even Taylor was confident it was a girl. He told us every night he was having a sister. When we gently explained, he might have a baby brother, he would scream and say "no, I'm not. It's a sister! It's a sister!"
We took Taylor to the sonogram with us. It was such a precious moment. We were relieved to know the baby was growing well and was healthy, but when the nurse asked us if we wanted to know the baby's sex, we all held our breaths. (Taylor yelled, "I already know it's a girl"). I started to cry. I didn't know how I was going to explain it to him if he was wrong. The nurse assured him that he was right! I cried some more. I had had some very strong dreams and spiritual impressions about a baby girl over the last 4 years while waiting, but now it was coming true. I asked the nurse if she was SURE. Of course she replied, "we can't ever be 100% sure". I felt a small pain of discouragement. "But, I'm 99% percent" confident. "Go home and paint that baby's room." Hooray!!!
The nesting phase consisted mostly of shopping and obsessing. I would stare at our daughter's room every day. I would envision her crying as a baby, playing as a little girl, and trying to sneak out her window as a teenager. Whew! Was I really ready for all of this?
I quickly made plans for how we would design the nursery and we finally agreed on green and purple with butterflies. I continued to shop like a maniac and bought tons of cute clothes for a bargain. What can I say, I waited so long to shop for a little girl, I just couldn't help myself. Once I spent $45 buying outfits from a lady off of craigslist ($1 each). Brandon finally said it was time to cut me off. Although I did manage to sneak in a few more purchases after that.
The most recent dilema was in regards to our daughter's name. Even before the sonogram, we had two names we really liked. Brandon had randomly come up with the name "Ambry" by combining our two names together and Taylor declared he had a vision (yes, he used that word) and we were suppose to name our baby "Sedriano". This later changed into his obsession with the name "Catie". We're still not sure were Sedriano came from. We both had clarity that her name would be either Catie or Ambry. Yet we (mostly Brandon) were still having a hard time committing to a final decision.
Ever since I had attended the temple back in March, I knew what her name should be. It was reaffirmed to me again during the sonogram that our baby's name was Ambry.... but now we had a problem. Taylor was convinced I was wrong. He called her Catie every day and would cry (literally sob) if I talked any differently. On two seperate occassions, I tried to explain things to him, but his eyes would simply swell up with giant legitimate tears. I felt stuck. Could I be wrong? Did the name really matter that much? Thus, I resorted to the tactics of a sneaky mother. I told Taylor that every time he said the word Ambry, his sister would start to kick. He got such pleasure in thinking every time he said her name, I would get punched in the stomach. (although on many occassions this was in fact true).
It took about two months of this continual game to help him relax and get use to the idea
of a different name. Now, it is simply second nature for him. I love the way it sounds when he says "Ammm...breee" in his cute little Texas accent. There is something very special about this baby. She has brought us all together as a family. We love her so much already! It is as if she is meant to be a part of us.
Despite the small occasional panic attack (how will we afford this, will I keep working, will she be born healthy, will labor be okay, etc.) we are so blessed. We are so thankful for our friends and family who have supported us during this journey. May your prayers continue to bless our lives as we feel of your love and grow as a family. Thank you for everything.
(Yes, I'm still planning on a hypnobirthing labor- just in case you were wondering) :)
